Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Cans of creamed corn stacked floor to ceiling

Ever have a line of thought that is so different and out of character for you that it really kind of freaks you out?

I've never been what you would call a survivalist. Sure, I'm an Eagle Scout, I know some knots, and if pressed I could probably maybe make a crappy little shelter out of a tarp and some rope, and I could maybe even remember how to acquire a bit of water with a piece of plastic and a rock, and only then if the sun is out. But dude, I haven't the faintest idea how to trap an animal to eat, or what to do with the motherfucker once I've got it trapped. I don't know which wild berries you can eat and which will turn your stomach inside out. And looking around my house, there is a severe lack of emergency preparedness going on. That realization my friends, that line of thought, the very fact that I am even thinking about emergency preparedness is the thing that has me noticing that there is something different going on in my brain.

But I don't think it's just me. There's a realization going on in this country, or rather a re-realization, in the aftermath of the raging she-bitch known as Katrina, that the federal government cannot be counted on to provide adequate help in times of crisis. I've read story after story in source after source, and there seems to be this concensus that is rising to the surface. The government of the wealthiest nation in the world, when faced with a massive crisis that calls for swift and immediate action and for all the bullshit and red tape to be dropped for just a little while so we can get some shit done, an event that requires the intense focus of resources on the tasks of saving lives and taking care of people (and animals), that government simply cannot be relied on. And that's scary.

It's scary because this feels like a new level of distrust. Conservative, liberal, whatever, you're hard pressed to find anybody that trusts the government, and for good reason. We're kinda used to getting fucked in more competent ways. But now people are getting fucked by rather incompetent means. Goddammit, we have an entire city, no, an entire region that has been decimated, these people have NOTHING, can we get some help in there NOW please? No, no we can't, not today, maybe tomorrow. Maybe. And as far as I can tell, it's because Moe, Larry, and Curly are in charge. Yeah, the government's got its people in there FINALLY, but as far as I can tell, if it weren't for the generosity and hard work of local organizations, churches, and random good samaritans, there'd be a hell of a lot more starving people and dead bodies.

And it's got me wondering, if the shit ever hits the fan around here, what the hell are we gonna eat?

Now I've got these thoughts of keeping stockpiles of food on hand, canned everything, lotsa water, plenty of fuel for the camp stove, bunches o' batteries, etcetera, and I feel weird thinking like this because I feel like it's the eve of Y2K again, except this time I'm on the other side - instead of rolling my eyes at the hysteria, now I'm one of the stockpile nuts with his underground shelter and his camo and his big-ass guns. Well, none of that stuff, but a lot of food at least.

This kind of thinking makes me uncomfortable. I don't like the idea of living and acting under the assumption that the next big shitblast is about to land somewhere nearby, but I don't want me and mines to be totally screwed if it does. I want to live, not survive, but I have to survive if I'm going to do either.

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